Someone called out, "What's the verdict on Edward?"I watched while standing in a doorway, out of her sight. With a slight upward twitch of her mouth, which may be loosely called a smile, she gave a thumbs-up signal. There were a few freshman in the mob who clapped at the verdict. I was immensely relieved. I definitely didn't want to post any pictures of anyone. Actually, if it had come down to it, I would have just taken the result close-mouth. But I was happy not to be subjected to that.When the bell rang for the last class of the day, I walked down the row of book lockers reserved for juniors. When she opened her locker, I walked up to her and handed her the unopened postal package.She felt it, gingerly, knowing what it had to be. Then she looked at me."You could have kept it and continued to blackmail me into going out with you. Crystal too, I suppose." I know. But, I don't think I'd ever be able to trust you." I can see why you'd think that. You may even be right. Crystal dumped. And give instructions. Plus make sure you understand what ashameful thing self-abuse is. I'll make sure to drive home thatmessage."At that moment I saw my mistake. Having my wish granted was going tobe very costly. Being denied a sex life was terrible. But gainingone that could change how I saw myself -- in more ways than hadalready been done -- could lead me along a dark path from which Imight never return.In a weak voice, pitched like a girl's the way she insisted on, Isaid, "I'm sorry. That's not really necessary. I spoke withoutthinking. Can we just go on the way we have been?" No, dear. I appreciate that you were honest with me, even though youwere rude about it. And I want to help you. But at the same time,you have to accept the help I'm offering and cooperate. In fact, Iinsist that you do that."My shoulders sagged. I stood there in front of her, wearing acolorful sports bra that laid flat against my soft pectorals. Theexercise shorts I wore had a tiny front and.
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